my Dad makes dad jokes but because hes a physics teacher theyre not common dad jokes
"hey dad, whats up?"
"Up is a directional vector with no force"
fuck those people that say “you never bother to talk with me” when they never bothered to talk to you either
I can hear my neighbour in the room beside me having very loud interactions with someone else (grunting, saying of dirty phrases, and lots of vigorous bed movement) and i’m just here sitting in my onesie eating pop tarts trying to watch pokemon
oh they must be redecorating
my neighbors redecorate all the time too
I just heard
"oh yeah baby, I like that"
sounds like your neighbour is good at redecorating
sometimes things are tough but look at this bun
‘he’s not even hot!!’
woa.. it’s almost like.. they chose him because of his acting abilities… not his physical appearance…. take it in, kids..
READ THE LAST ONE OUT LOUD
YOU WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED
I want a remote that makes people shut the fuck up with the click of a button
this has too many notes to be safe
i’m on mobile and it doesn’t load the image but from my experience with this website i guess it’s a gun
I love seeing people walking by with little smiles on their face because something small happened that made them happy. Maybe they got a cute text, maybe they got laid, maybe they killed a man. You will never know.
Some days I’m like..
And other days I’m like..